Teens dating young older adults
In the initial years following, I never really talked about this with anyone other than my high school girlfriends and various therapists.
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How wonderful it felt to have an "adult" who valued our opinion; thought we were not just cute but interesting.
My best friend was 14 when she fell in love with a 21 year old. My friend's older boyfriend was close with a guy I'll call T. My mother, spying him from the front window, asked me how old he was.
Age differences in relationships are no longer important as long as two people find something in common.
(I know how that sounds: I cringe now just typing it.) But at the time, to us, it wasn't weird or taboo as much as this epic, forbidden romance. Before long we were all hanging out together, driving around in his car: T and me in the front, my friend and her boyfriend in the back.
While they made out, we made conversation, thrown together in the awkwardness of nearby coupledom.
He, in turn, went to find my friend and her boyfriend, who were none too pleased at having to leave so soon after we got there. Just like that, you lose your footing, and you're in over your head. He noticed my sudden distance and pouted, unsettling to see in an adult. It seemed just about every woman I knew had a similar story, a time when wanting attention meant getting the wrong kind entirely.
Hearing that he wanted more felt like wading into the deep end. had feelings for me, I felt strange every time I saw him. As I got older, however, the more I realized that my experience was not an uncommon one.