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Though, she questioned, this may not be entirely the fault of dating apps, but how people use them.“Dating apps work for men, and older men, but don’t work for older women,” my mom said.She’s also tried Happn and Ok Cupid, but quickly trashed them because she didn’t find a big enough pool of users in her age range, or found the app to be too trendy.Sites like e Harmony and Match, she said, seemed “a little too old” and hard to “get a full sense of who is available.” She enjoyed the control Bumble gave her, and the ability to not be bombarded by messages but to make the first move instead. The variety, though, “can be scary.” “When you just get out of a long marriage or a long relationship, it is weird to go out with anybody,” Gonzalez told me. She’s over 55, has been married, had kids, owns a home, and has been providing for herself for years.Another asked her to be his fourth wife after only a couple of dates.“This is a big business and they are missing out,” said Gonzalez, referring to popular dating app companies who don’t cater to older people.

She was no longer looking for someone to take care of her – she was doing a fine job already – but someone to love and be loved by.

This is also a truth Carolina Gonzalez, a writer in London, came face-to-face with after her 28-year marriage ended.

At 57, she downloaded Bumble – Tinder seemed too aggressive, she told me.

And though she didn’t join Tinder with specific expectations, something wasn’t clicking. “No one I met on the app, none of them, wanted a committed, long-term relationship,” she said.

“A lot of them are looking for threesomes or just want to have a conversation, but what about me?

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